Self-esteem is…

It’s the second Friday of the month, and I bring to you yet another interesting interview. You know I care about you and your growth, and that is why I do this. 😉

Have you ever heard of ‘the influential woman?’ Yes? No? Well, sit back and enjoy this ride. It’s amazing, I promise.

Drum rolls, please…😁

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Zoey: Okay, let’s begin with general introductions; I’m Amami Yusuf (Zoey) and I am a blogger.

You’re the third guest on the “Featured Friday”. Where I interview individuals who have amassed some level of growth.

The Influential Woman: Okay, ma’am.

Zoey: So, do tell us, please, who THE INFLUENTIAL WOMAN is (Love the name, by the way).

The Influential Woman: Thank you!😊😊 My name is Precious Chika Emmanuel. I am a self-esteem coach and content strategist.

I help individuals rise above low self-esteem and explore their uniqueness as a self-esteem coach.

Zoey: Amazing!

The Influential Woman: I named myself Influential Woman because I saw a need for positive influence especially amongst teenagers and young adults and I decided I was going to fill it to the best of my ability.

It’s been amazing how the name is living to its expectations.

Zoey: What did we hear about names and the power to become, right?
Well, I must say; we see what you do, we appreciate it, we love every bit of it and we love you as well.

The Influential Woman: Awwwwwn…. Thank you so much. This is so kind.

Zoey: Rumor has it that you are a vlogger— A Better You!. How did that all come about and what has the experience been like so far?

The Influential Woman: Lol! Rummor is correct. I am vlogger.

I have a YouTube channel…. Still in it’s infant stage (about 2 months now). I share about self-esteem, developing ones’ self, and teaching practical methods to get that done.

Zoey: Awesome! We’d link that at the end of this interview, so people can find you and be as blessed as I have been.

The Influential Woman: A better you is my brand name as it regards self-esteem building.

The topic of self-esteem is a very personal one to me. I learned experientially how low self-esteem can reduce the quality of one’s life and keep such a one away from ever achieving great dreams and goals.

After I overcame and began to enjoy the benefits of healthy self-esteem, I knew I had to help as many others that are suffering from this.

So ‘A BETTER YOU’ came into existence. I create lots of content around it— written and video contents.

For the experience, I would say amazing and humbling. I knew there were many people in the web of low self-esteem. And seeing that what I do has its effects and plays its role in helping people overcome is a blessing.

I’ve received testimonies and have seen for myself and for that, I’m truly grateful for grace.

Anyone in a position to give: be it resources, knowledge, etc will always meet a glitch.

There are times it gets tiring especially with having to create and put out content; but, It’s something I’ve got to do. I’m also quite passionate about the topic.

Lastly, it grows even me as I do it.
Self-development is a continuous thing and so as I teach, I learn even better.

Zoey: It’s really amazing hearing testimonies from others on how your work helped them. Kudos to more, ma’am.

(The Influential Woman: Thank you, ma’am).

And that’s true. We give even to ourselves as we give selflessly to others.

From the self-esteem guru, what exactly is self-esteem?

The Influential Woman: Self-esteem is defined as the evaluation and judgment of one’s self— what you believe about yourself and what you think you’re worth.
I define it as the degree to which you know that you’re worthy and of great value.

If it’s low, it means you don’t consider yourself as worthy, and then it’s impossible to believe in yourself, the things you can do, or the good you’re deserving.

It’s at this point that you take whatever you get because you’re even grateful to have gotten what you have even if it’s way below what you deserve.
It’s like the heir to a throne that thinks himself as a servant
If it’s healthy, then it’s beautiful.

You go for the things you deserve, you know when and where to draw boundaries and get the respect you deserve.

There are so many other beautiful things like even relationships with people around you. Self-esteem ensures security. An insecure person can never keep any form of relationship together properly.

Zoey: Does that mean our beliefs about ourselves can be altered— positively or negatively?

The Influential Woman: Yes, it can.

Zoey: I came across a self-esteem test once. The test was to imagine you’re in a room filled with blindfolded people, including yourself. And an announcement is made for the most beautiful person in that room to rise.

If I don’t rise, does that mean I have a low or unhealthy esteem?

The Influential Woman: This is a great test; because one of the things a healthy self-esteem does is that it helps you appreciate yourself exclusive of other people.

So in this test, you don’t need to see others to compare and know who’s beautiful. I know I’m beautiful and that’s what matters.

The next girl may be drop dead gorgeous, TO GOD BE THE GLORY, HE CREATED US ALL BEAUTIFUL. Instead of thinking she’s more beautiful than me.

Zoey: Hahaha to God be the glory o.

The Influential Woman: Yes oo.

Zoey: What if I’m just being modest? Lol. Does that still count as an unhealthy esteem?

The Influential Woman: In this scenario? Lol… Modesty can’t play out here.
The human mind doesn’t exactly work like that. Knowing that all eyes are closed, it’s either I’m beautiful or am not.

Or I think I’m beautiful because people say I am but I’m too shy to get up… what if…. And this second conversation in your head is a result of an unhealthy self-esteem.

Zoey: True! So much wisdom, ahhh.

The Influential Woman: Thank you.

Zoey: What is the line of distinction between a healthy esteem (confidence) and pride/arrogance? Sometimes, we tend to get both mixed up.

The Influential Woman: Interesting question. I love this. There’s a great distinction between a healthy esteem and an inflated esteem.

An inflated self-esteem is just low self-esteem manifesting in toxicity.
Unlike low self-esteem where you think everyone is better than you and so stay below, inflated self-esteem thinks that everyone is above them, but will rather drag people down to meet them.

And so they’re rude, arrogant and hide their low self-esteem behind a mask of toxic behavior.
The “do you know who I am all the time” kind of people. The one’s that will look at people and only spot flaws because it makes them feel better about themselves.

Zoey: Yeaah!
Earlier you mentioned something about experience with the whole low esteem stuff, what one experience has stood out for you?

The Influential Woman: I turned down lots of opportunities because I didn’t think I was up to the task or even deserving of it.

Lots of opportunities. I always felt they’d fail because I didn’t have what it took. It hurt me so much but I couldn’t bring myself to get out of my own way.

Zoey: Oh my! Terrible indeed.
Thank God you’ve been able to conquer that.

The Influential Woman: Thank God!

Zoey: What advice would you give to a younger you right now?

The Influential Woman: It’s OK to Fail. It doesn’t make you any less. So deal with fear and get out of your own way.

Zoey: Gracias muchos, mami. Thank you for your time.

The Influential Woman: Thank you for the honor. I had a great time.

Zoey: Awww. I did too.

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Did you learn a thing or two? Share your comments below.

Also, you can follow the Influential Woman’s vlog at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCv8gcLYL2L755YQ-fBRVM3A

Sending love and light your way.

Cheers to steady growth,

Zoey.