CONTROL!

I don’t know why it has taken me this long to publish this particular post, but here it goes…

At some point in my writing journey/career, I stopped being consistent. In fact, I stopped putting myself ‘out there’ for a really long time. And the few people who knew me as a writer then, had almost forgotten that fact about me.

While I stopped writing, I never stopped reading— people’s content, that is. And with each time I read from someone, I felt two emotions so strongly.

Inspiration and envy became my two constant companions. Before you give me the imperfect-human-badge, I’d like to remind you that I’m an imperfect human, striving for perfection daily.

Anyway, back to the point. I always felt inspired— to pick up writing actively again— and envious at how much impact they were making in relatively short times.

And sometimes, I sat with myself and had ‘the talk’; coming to the realization that I would have made same or more impact— in my own little way— if I had stayed consistent those two years I wasn’t.

Every time I reminded myself that, I indeed again felt two things so strongly— anger and guilt.

Imagine having to deal with these three negative emotions, amidst other things as well.

If you knew me then and thought I was at such a peaceful place within, now you know better. It was a constant war.

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A week ago, while conducting the interview [with the energy god (check previous post)], I understood even more strongly how emotions can tear us apart, and at the same time, fix us back together— it all matters with what you decide to do with those things you feel.

For me, when I had finally had enough of my own excuses and inconsistency, I dusted my [online] files, and picked up my pen again.

Truth is, those 3 negative emotions were my main fuel. They— envy, guilt and anger— were what spurred me back to action. My fire was rekindled, and this time, with even more vigour.

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There’s this one friend of mine who always believes and tells me that I’ve been blessed with the mastery over my emotions. Those are not his exact words, but hey…

Another friend once wrote something similar about me, to me. Well, I never really took their word for it, but now—looking back on every roller coaster ride that constitutes my life— I’m beginning to think there just might be some truth in it.

I have been able, time and time again, to turn my [negative] emotions into something positive. Even the most unlikely of them. This may not be such a superpower or some big deal, but it is indeed a superpower— every human’s one of many superpowers.

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You may be wondering why I just told you all these, well, here’s why;

These emotions have been given to us, FOR us. (Do read that again, emphasis on the ‘for’).

That’s right, emotions have been given to us, FOR us. And anything given for you is more or less meant to serve you, or in the least, meet some needs.

They were never placed within you to be lord over you, but rather, for you. For the mere fact that they exist for you means you can have control over them and put them to work for you.

Like what I did; I channeled those emotions and made them work for me, in my favor, that is. And you can too. In fact, you should.

Here’s one trick I’ve learned per experience; ensure to always learn from each experience.

When you do learn, your next step of action becomes easier, and in fact, clearer.

So, don’t just let those negative emotions come and have free occupancy in your mind; learn from each one and put it to work in your favor.

Did you find this helpful? Drop a comment and tell me all about it. I’d really love to read from you as well.

PS: this wasn’t the direction I intended for this post to go, but I’m super excited over the outcome.

I’m sending love and light your way.

Cheers to steady growth,

Zoey.