Why Do you Need to Master Self-control?

Have you heard— or read— tales of wo/men who got into so much trouble, got injured, or perhaps killed for having an affair with another’s spouse?

Are you familiar with the jungle justice system in some parts of Nigeria, where a thief who has been caught is burnt alive?

Or perhaps, it’s as simple as signing up for a gym class to lose weight, yet eating like World Peace depended on it and at odd hours of the day.

These scenarios— and the responses that follow from the other parties— are all practical examples of a life with no self-control.

I could just stop here with this blog post, but I haven’t done half justice as to why you need to master self-discipline.

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Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control.
Proverbs 25:28 NIV

A person with no self-control is likened to a city that has broken down walls. It goes without saying that self-control serves as a defense, of some sort, to your spirit and ultimately life.

Lack of self-control destroys you, while the presence of it preserves you from destruction. Lack of self-control is you setting yourself up for trouble.

Here’s a picture of how lack of self-control sets you up for disaster; It was Saturday evening when Mrs. Zed strolled down the street. She was heading to the grocery store to do the homely shopping. Just by the corner at the end of the street, she passed a well-lit jewelry store. There was this lovely piece on display that caught her attention, and before she could stop herself, she had already helped herself in.

She was already imagining how well it would match that margenta dress hanging in her closet and the particular event she would wear it to. No doubt, she would steal the show. She smiled as she ran a finger along the piece. She was allowed to try it on and she enjoyed every bit of it indeed— imagining herself at the event, while looking at her reflection in the mirror.

The sales rep was about to have it packed for her when her (Mrs. Zed’s) eyes went to the price tag. Of course, for such a lovely piece, it was bound to be expensive. She knew there and then that she should drop it back and walk away; she couldn’t afford it anyway. The ‘spare’ cash she had in her account was the money her husband had sent to her account for safe keeping. It was to be used to pay their house rent when the time came around. All odds not in her favor, the rent was due in exactly two weeks.

However, she convinced herself that if she passed up on the offer at the moment, it may be gone before she could get the money to pay up for it. And besides, “I could just secretly apply for a loan from the bank before two weeks swings by and I’d have the money for the rent without my husband knowing.” Seeming like she had come up with the perfect plan, she quickly made the purchase.

Unfortunately, however, the bank delayed the loan, thus, bringing her secret out in the open; The landlord was impatient and would not have any excuses nor pleas. Her husband was furious and disappointed. And to add to it all, the jewelry store had a ‘no return policy’ nor could she get a ready buyer to take the jewelry off her hands. There was trouble spelled on every side.

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Of course, this is a totally fictional story. Do feel free to give it the perfect ending you please.

When desire meets wrong timing, coupled with lack of self-control, the outcome is always disaster. For some, it may be a more serious fix than Mrs. Zed’s experience; for others, it may be as ‘little’ as stealing away some snack at midnight. Whatever the situation, however, the outcome remains the same.

It’s never wrong to have desires, but if it would cost you at the time and you lack self discipline, then you are merely setting yourself up for destruction.

Self-control is the ability to set healthy boundaries to guard your reckless desires.

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For a second, imagine Mrs. Zed as that city with no walls (healthy boundaries). When her desires met temptation, she cracked. And it cost her.

Now, imagine her again as a city with strong, fortified walls and then came the jewelry temptation. But because she has been able to build self discipline and set healthy boundaries to guard her desires, the tempter went back disappointed.

Lack of self-control makes you make bad decisions; makes you give yourself reasons why you should oblige and ultimately drags you into a mess.

One harmless ”one more wouldn’t hurt” and you’ve got yourself in some fix. Be it in your eating habits, spending habits, character, relationships— you name it— you need self discipline, and so do I.

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Did you find this helpful? Do share with family and friends so we can all learn from this and improve.

If you have any questions or contributions, leave a comment below or connect with me personally. I’d love to read from you.

Also, what areas do you think you need self-control? You should totally put in the work. I’m rooting for you.

For our Muslim friends, this comes in handy this season as well. Happy Ramadan! ❤️

Cheers to steady growth.

Sending love and light your way,

Zoey.